Marvel: 1. (verb) be filled with wonder or astonishment. 2. (movie studio) take that same wonder and astonishment and attempt to stretch it over two presidencies.

I remember as a child finding my Christmas presents in the closet a full month early. I was so excited to see this enormous white bag emblazoned with Jeffrey the Giraffe and the brightly colored Toys R’ Us logo, but I couldn’t touch them. I couldn’t play with them until Christmas morning.

And that’s how the latest reveal of Marvel’s Phase 3 movie line-up makes me feel. Heroes and villains that have been begging for movies finally see the light of the silver screen … up to 5 years from now. What? Ugh.

I remember sitting in an IMAX theater in New Orleans on a field trip to watch … something… I don’t remember that part, but I DO remember the trailer that played before it. “Star Wars: A New Hope” remastered with cutting edge CGI and deleted scenes added. My friends and I lost our collective minds at the prospect.

That trailer surprised me and made me excited to see this movie. I was anxious for the entire six months it took to finally hit theaters, and I gladly forked over a stack of cash to get tickets for me and my girlfriend (who promptly fell asleep during the Death Star explosion, bless her heart.)

I think movie reveals are better when they can build hype for a title, but then deliver on the tension within a reasonable time frame. Not when I’m 41.

I imagine this is what it would be like if your parents revealed to you everything you’re getting for Christmas for the next 5 years.

Class dismissed.